Certificate of Completion...Sort Of

The time has come! A "guest" post from Douglas Moffett McNamee himself. While many of you are gearing up for a new school year, we went to a "class" of a different sort on Saturday. Here's Doug's reflections on our all-day adoption class (we even got a certificate suitable for framing!) and where we are in the process...

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So you’ll immediately be able to identify who’s writing this blog just a few lines in as you notice it only requires a 3^rd grade reading level and not the post-graduate reading level necessary for the previous entries by the PhD in communication. Lacy promised a few guest entries from the other half of the adopting McNamee duo (me), so I couldn’t disappoint. My intellect isn’t as high and humor isn’t as witty, but I’ll try to compensate for the lack of both of those by sharing from my heart the excitement I have about our journey...

The last few days have seen a lot of activity for us. Lacy and I took another big step to being “adoption ready” as we completed Generation's all-day orientation class on Saturday. It was a LONG day (in my opinion, *maybe* 1 hour out of the 7 could have been shaved off...but, hey, who's asking me) but still really good.

I like to use bullet points, but I’m not sure they are blog appropriate. I’m not blog appropriate, though, so I’m going to use bullet points and recap some of the more  memorable takeaways from our day.

• We were joined in the class with 10 other great couples - and we were the ONLY couple from Waco. The closest anyone else lived was Ft. Worth, with others from Austin, San Antonio, Houston and beyond. That in itself was a great reminder of a few important things. First, as Lacy and I grumbled at the idea of getting up early on a Saturday and having to spend it all day at this class, we were humbled to realize that everyone else sacrificed even more of their time with many coming in the night before staying in a hotel and all not returning home until late on Saturday. It was a small but significant reminder for us that while, at times, we’ve been frustrated and challenged by our own circumstances, others have had to face much more challenging situations. In addition, it was reassuring to know the great reputation Generations Adoptions has built up across Texas. Many of these couples had plenty of agencies they could have chosen closer to home, but they picked Generations because of personal references, church ties, or general research on the internet of good Christian adoption agencies. Just another example of Waco being underrated with what is has to offer.
• The day was long, but I’d breakdown the really valuable parts into the following four segments: interaction with other couples in similar situations as us, an attorney who specializes in the legalese of adoptions, hearing from adoptive families, and hearing from birthmothers.
• Without question, Lacy and I agreed the most powerful segment was the time we heard from and asked questions of the birthmothers. Two were there to share their stories, and they were impressive women. While very different, both shared the common bond of showing a love for their children that was incredible.  They spoke of their experiences, the situations that led them to make the decisions they did, the pain they endured in the overall process, but, most adamantly, about the joy they had in their hearts because they knew they made the decision to provide their children a better life than they could give them on their own. Throughout the adoption education we’ve received, I’ve held nothing but appreciation and respect for the birthmother. Getting to hear their stories elevated our appreciation and respect to that of ultimate admiration of their courage. While "hero" may not seem a likely word in this situation, in a world where there are many alternative to the direction these women chose, it’s hard to accurately convey the near-heroism and selflessness they displayed with their decision. This isn’t a foster care situation where the State is stepping in to make a decision on behalf of the mother: this is a conscious, brave, and loving choice the mother has made to give her child opportunities she could not provide on her own.
• On a more humorous note, one of the birth moms was asked about how she selected the adoptive parents she did. Of several reasons, they had to like the Dallas Cowboys (she's a HUGE Cowboys fan). She said if you liked the Eagles or Redskins, you were definitely out of the mix. Uh oh. Lacy and I need to hope there are less moms out there cheering for the Cowboys, or we're in big trouble. There are a few non-negotiables in life, and that’s one of them...even if means delaying my timeline to becoming a dad. :)
• The adoptive families (many of whom had their kids with them) were as impressive to watch as they were to hear from. As they shared their stories, you could see the beautiful mixtures of families who clearly loved and were loved by their children. They had a sense of humor about their journeys and encouraged the 11 couples in front of them because they had walked in their shoes. One couple waited 3 months from the time they were officially eligible to bring their baby home and one waited 3.5 years to do the same. But all turned to their faith in the process and were thankful for the outcome regardless of the duration. The biggest takeaway from their stories was this: while adoption can be a painful wait and a messy, awkward voyage, it’s not second place to having your own child. There are so many unique things about adoption that are impossible to replicate, and while you miss out on things you would have in birthing your own child, you also get to be a part of something that you can produce on your own. It was clear to see why people are so passionate about adoption regardless of their ability to have a child of their own.

So we head down the road with a few more big obstacles past us. We still have some final paperwork in the “adoption bureaucratic process” to complete including fingerprints and tracking down a full three-month transaction history of all our checking, savings, and investment accounts. But we are closer each day - and as soon as we wrap those minor things up, the case workers will come to the house for the home study (which I think we are in good shape for because Lacy keeps this place like it's staged for an HGTV show. Ha.). After that point, we’ll be officially “on the clock” to be selected in the adoption draft (in other news, late first round is now looking like it was a little high for Johnny Football, folks).

We don’t know exactly what’s ahead for us and the timeline, but we are certain to expect the unexpected. We're pretty sure there’s a few more curve balls headed our way, but we are more confident than ever that adoption is something we have a heart for - and we anxiously await for what God has in store for us in the months ahead. Your prayers are appreciated and felt.